Managing emotions is a critical part of test performance.

However, this aspect of test preparation is not often discussed. In fact, students are mostly left to their own whims and coping strategies when it comes to dealing with these big emotions.

Big emotions around doing important things like high stakes tests are completely normal. Having feelings does not necessarily mean a student has “test anxiety” - rather it means that they care about the test, and it’s important to them.

On the other end of the spectrum, you don’t want your student to be too relaxed either. Being too relaxed can mean that they aren’t well prepared, don’t care or aren’t being honest with themselves about the test.

For most students, “anxiety” in this context means handling emotions that are interfering with their ability to adequately do the test.

On the other hand, if your emotions around a test are crippling your students ability to function - i.e. sobbing, vomiting or other strong physical responses - you should seek an evaluation and care from a mental health professional.

So what are some things you can encourage your student to do (and practice) to be calm and focused on test day? Here are 7 tips that your student can use to channel their emotions to succeed on the test!

1. Acknowledge your feelings

   A good first step is to simply recognize that you are feeling something out of the ordinary. They might say that they feel off, or you might ask them how they are feeling. Sometimes just stopping to think about what they are feeling is enough to help them dial in to their emotions.

2. Name the feeling

   Giving names to feelings helps to take away much of their power. By sorting through their feelings - there may be multiple and competing feelings at the same time - students can take control of their emotional life and make big emotions much more understandable and manageable.

3. Why am I feeling like that?

   Feelings don’t usually just spring from nowhere. They are a byproduct of our experiences, our beliefs and our thoughts. Helping students be vulnerable and honest with themselves about why they are feeling each of their feelings will help them to take another step toward understanding and managing their emotions.

4. Is it true?

   This is an often overlooked step in processing our feelings. Sometimes our feelings can come about from faulty beliefs or thinking. It is worth helping your student examine, “Is the reason you’re feeling this way actually true.” For example, a student might be feeling nervous because, “I’m going to fail this test and never get into college.” Is that true? No, probably not. Encourage your student to truthfully describe the reality of the situation - this will make feelings more manageable. When these same feelings come up again, your student will also be able to tell themselves that what they fear isn’t true and to explain to themselves what is.

5. Feel the feeling then let it go

   Often with feelings, especially big ones, we can let them overwhelm us and we allow ourselves to concentrate on responding to them. Another unhealthy tactic is to pretend like the feeling doesn’t exist and we try to push it away. This just causes it to bubble up late some other time or place. It comes back even stronger and worse more disconnected from why we are really feeling it. Remember, we are in control of our responses to our feelings. We can feel the feeling and let it pass over us rather than trying to fight it or push it away.

6. Have a plan -

   If your student is prepared for test day then they should have a plan in place for their general approach to each section. They also should have practiced a strategy for tackling different kinds of test problems. However, if they find themselves unprepared, encourage them to take a minute or two to think about and decide what they will do to accomplish the test. These should be clear, actionable and specific. They should avoid telling themselves negative actions like “don’t go too fast.” Change it to something positive and simple like, “I will slow down by making sure that I read every word of the problem.”

7. Remember that an SAT score is not a measure of your student’s humanity

   It’s easy to take test scores personally. Students often internalize their score or their test performance as a reflection of who they are as a person. They mistakenly beat themselves up and view their test score as a measure of their intelligence and ultimately their worth. It is not. The test score is just the test score. Encourage them to do their best. Help them strive to improve. But above all else remind them that they are an amazing human being - always! No test score - good or bad - will change that.

I hope this list helps your student build a framework for managing their emotions not just around standardized tests but also in any high stress/high performance situation.